I’ve always been torn as I’ve risen up the career ladder about who I am and who I am expected to be. It’s a really difficult scenario. I’m sure others have been there.
You’ve always been one of the team – a colleague, a friend. You’ve chatted, you’ve laughed, you’ve got drunk together and done silly things then you get promoted. And …
The work dynamic changes. You’re someone’s boss. Then it can change again, and again and more people come into the equation and join your team.
Now, don’t get me wrong, you have a job to do as you get promoted and that’s important and needs to be taken seriously and the job needs to be done, but to me that doesn’t change the fact that you are still the same person underneath as you were when you started so, does that person have to change?
- Can you still be friends with people when you are their boss?
- Can you still be yourself with people when you are their boss?
- Do you have to change when you are promoted?
Now you know how much I love my music and how I can relate that to what I am thinking so Christina Perri’s ‘Human’ seems pretty apt when I think about this situation.
But I’m only human
And I bleed when I fall down
I’m only human
And I crash and I break down
The bottom line is I am still human. Whatever my job title. Whether I am an administrator or a director I am Human! I am the same as each and every one of my team and I want them to know that. Is that wrong? I don’t think so.
I want them to know that like them I get angry when the systems crash or something doesn’t work out just like they do. I want them to know that I find that joke hilarious on a Friday afternoon because I have a sense of humour. I want them to know that I cry when something upsets me and it’s ok to cry and be upset. I want them to know that I am there whenever they need me; for whatever that may be. To talk. To need time off because of a family crisis. To shout at because they are having a bad day. To give a hug if they want it because it will make them feel better.
Yes, I have responsibilities and I take them seriously. I do my job and I do it well. But I hope they realise that there is a balance. There is Director Kirsty who does the job that needs doing but there is also the Human Kirsty who is just the same as them.
I know I’m not there to be liked and it’s not a popularity contest but I love going to the office. I love my teams. They are a pleasure to work with. We all have our off days and I’m sure we all annoy each other from time to time but I hope that they all feel the same about working with me and know that I will be there for them no matter what.
Overall I hope they know that I am only human and have feelings too.
Right or wrong … I am me and that’s how I’ve decided I want it to be.